Letters Home
by Sareki02
Summary: (P/T) A compilation of the letters Tom writes home after Voyager is able to communicate with the Alpha Quadrant. Rated PG.


**Author's Notes:**

The genesis of this story comes from utter confusion at a line in Homecoming (the first of the post Endgame novels) that seems to indicate that Admiral Paris had no idea Tom was married or had a baby on the way. That made no sense if they had been communicating with the Alpha Quadrant for almost a year. However I did wonder what Tom would tell his family, thus this collection.

In Life Line, it is said they can transmit letters once every thirty-two days. Coming up with a timeline for how the episodes fit into this scheme was difficult. I started with the original air dates and then tried to incorporate information given in the episodes (e.g. "It's been three weeks since…"). I am sure what I decided it isn't perfect so I just ask for your suspension of disbelief. Here is a list of episodes and what week I decided to give them. Some may span time (like Life Line and Workforce) so just gave the first week (the date given is the Monday of that week).

4-Apr-77 Life Line  
>16-May-77 Haunting of Deck Twelve<br>30-May-77 Unimatrix 1  
>6-Jun-77 Unimatrix 2<br>27-Jun-77 Imperfection  
>4-Jul-77 Drive<br>11-Jul-77 Repression  
>22-Aug-77 Critical Care<br>12-Sep-77 Inside Man  
>19-Sep-77 Body and Soul<br>26-Sep-77 Nightingale  
>10-Oct-77 Flesh and Blood<br>7-Nov-77 Shattered  
>21-Nov-77 Lineage<br>19-Dec-77 Repentance  
>16-Jan-78 Prophecy<br>23-Jan-78 The Void  
>30-Jan-78 Workforce 1<br>6-Feb-78 Workforce 2  
>27-Feb-78 Human Error<br>6-Mar-78 Q2  
>13-Mar-78 Author, Author<br>27-Mar-78 Friendship One  
>3-Apr-78 Natural Law<br>17-Apr-78 Homestead  
>15-May-78 Renaissance Man<br>22-May-78 Endgame

And I'm going with the names for Tom's family given in Pathways and the post Endgame novels (his mom is Julia and his two older sisters are Moira and Kathleen) even though I don't take them as canon… but people have to have names…

Many thanks to Delwin for betaing and to Izzy and my husband for their input. Also to photogirl1890 for reporting typos to me! This story was originally published on AO3 on September 11, 2014.

**Letters Home**

**May 10, 2377**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

Sorry you didn't get a letter 32 days ago. I'm sure Dad explained about the Doctor transmitting himself to Earth rather than our letters. He's due back tomorrow and then our letters will be sent.

It was good to hear about how you all are doing. It's so hard to believe that Moira has a kid and Kathleen recently got married. But I guess a lot of time had passed… things are different for me too. In any case, please give my love to everyone. I'll try to send a picture at some point so you may actually recognize me when we get home.

So… I must admit I don't know where to begin. Covering the last six years, well, that is not an easy task. Where to begin…

Well, I really love my job. It's been great being in the pilot seat again. I also got to design my own ship last year, the Delta Flyer. That was fantastic and I absolutely love flying it. We joke that the Flyer is my first born, the way I dote over her and all. Maybe when we get back I could work on designing small spacecraft… heck, B'Elanna and I could open our own shop.

B'Elanna. I guess that needs some explanation. From the manifest, you know that B'Elanna Torres is our chief engineer. Well, she is also my partner. We've been together for three years. I think it's going well… I am very fond of her. I think you'd like her. Well, at least I hope you will since she's kind of a fixture in my life. Maybe I should tell you about her? She grew up on a colony world, Kessik IV. She was raised by her mom since her parents got divorced when she was young.

Actually, maybe you could have Dad help us out with this. In the last data stream B'Elanna only got a letter from the Office of Personnel, saying they had contacted her father (John Torres) but had been unable to contact her mother (Miral, daughter of L'Naan last known location was Qo'noS). We didn't get a letter from her dad, maybe he didn't have time or something. But if maybe he could look into why they couldn't contact her mom, we'd appreciate it. B'Elanna is concerned that maybe her mom passed away. We don't know if the Office of Personnel would tell her that or if they would wait for a family member to break the news. Thanks in advance for any information.

But anyway, as you may have surmised, her mom is Klingon and her father is human. She is very talented at math and science and was enrolled in the engineering program at the Academy for two years. As I'm sure you know, she left and joined the Maquis before being thrown to the Delta Quadrant. We were friends for around three years before we began our relationship. It's been pretty good ever since.

Another side note. If Dad has any information about what would happen to the Maquis or to me when we get back that would be great. I know we are still thirty years away, but we've traveled the equivalent of that distance in six years, so who knows, maybe we'll get home tomorrow. It would just be one less thing to have in the back of my mind.

Anyway, I'm running short on time. I should have started this letter sooner. Next time I'll tell you about my best friend, Harry Kim. It was really good to hear from you, it put my mind at ease.

Until next month,

Tom

**June 11, 2377**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Mom,

Again, I don't know how to start this letter. First, tell Dad thanks for getting that information for B'Elanna.

Right now I'm sitting in sickbay, at B'Elanna's bedside (she's sleeping right now). She's going to be okay, but as usual I'm a wreck. Where to begin… Well, the captain got us involved in a Borg civil war. Since the ship's logs are being sent every month, I won't waste my time on explaining too much about all that. The point is that B'Elanna volunteered to be assimilated. We finally got her back yesterday (and the captain and Tuvok) and have been working nonstop to get them unassimilated. I went back to my quarters for a quick nap and, when I woke up, I saw your letter. I brought it to sickbay with me and B'Elanna was awake. I cannot tell you how relieved I was when she spoke to me and she was herself. My greatest fear was that she would wake up and not be her anymore… maybe she'd be like Seven (not that I don't like Seven… but, you know what I mean… well, probably not since you don't know Seven).

I'm rambling. Sorry. I'm tired. I would have given my new pip if she would have stayed. Oh. I got promoted. Back to junior grade lieutenant. But that should be in the ship's logs. It slipped my mind in all this craziness.

Anyway, B'Elanna was awake when I got back to sickbay so I broke it to her that her mom had passed. It was as she suspected. She seems to be taking it pretty well. Oh, she says, "Thank you for telling me about my mother and I look forward to meeting you as well."

I loved the picture you sent. It was great to be able to see you. When B'Elanna is better maybe we will take a picture of the two of us and send it to you, assuming there is room in the data stream.

I was going to tell you about Harry, but I am exhausted and the letters have to be submitted in just a few minutes. So that will have to wait until next time. Give my love to everyone.

Tom (and B'Elanna)

**July 13, 2377**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

Well, I'm just going to open with this: B'Elanna and I got married on Stardate 54058. The awesome thing is that's July 7, 2377. My wedding date is 7/7/77! I was excited when I realized this. B'Elanna thought I was being silly. But whatever, she's stuck with me now!

I guess you will want to hear about what happened. Well, B'Elanna and I were discussing where we wanted to take our relationship and I proposed. And she said yes. And we had the captain marry us that day. No big wedding, just us, the captain, Harry (who I still have not told you about…) and Chakotay (B'Elanna's very close to him). We then had our honeymoon in the Delta Flyer.

I know this sounds like we got married on a lark, but really, I've been thinking about asking her for a couple months now. I just didn't know how to bring it up. I guess I was afraid that she would say no. But she didn't. So now we are married.

Last week we got new quarters. B'Elanna and I weren't 'officially' living together, although for the last year or so we have been basically living in my quarters, mostly because I had the television. I keep forgetting that so much happened that I haven't told you about. Last year B'Elanna made an old fashioned television for me. I love it, and, to both mine and B'Elanna's surprise, she is quite taken by it as well. She likes shows with lots of action. This is totally off topic.

Anyway, new quarters. They are a bit bigger than my old quarters, which is nice. But they are still just one room and a bathroom. I had to get rid of some of my furniture so that everything would fit. It would be nice to have a second room, so one of us could sleep while the other was working. However, this is how it was in my old quarters, although we did have B'Elanna's quarters as well if we needed to have some space.

We got permission to send you a picture of us after we got married, so that should be attached. Since I am running out of time I just want you to know how happy B'Elanna and I are and things are going really well right now.

Tom

**August 14, 2377**

_The transmission never arrived._

**September 15, 2377**

_A hologram of Lieutenant Barclay was transmitted. The hologram stopped the crew from sending letters home, since it said that they would be home in three days. However, the hologram had been tampered with by the Ferengi._

**October 17, 2377**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

It has been a crazy couple of months in the Delta Quadrant. I'm sure you know about the Barclay hologram, although we just learned why the whole thing happened when Starfleet sent us the information in this data stream. He was such a nice and personable hologram…

But anyway, we spent just under two weeks stationary on a planet doing a major overhaul to Voyager. B'Elanna was in charge of the whole show, but unfortunately she didn't take any pity on me, so I was assigned to cleaning conduits and replacing relays. I mean, what was the point of marrying the chief engineer if I STILL can't get out of grunt work?

So, we finally get back into space when we get into trouble with some (possibly) sentient holograms and the Hirogen. In the whole fray, B'Elanna was kidnapped by the holograms, so I got to pace around the ship worried sick for a couple days. I can say one thing for sure: I am pretty much done with B'Elanna being kidnapped or hurt or assimilated. I must be getting old, because, although I love being on Voyager, there are days when I could really do with less danger and excitement. Especially when B'Elanna is in the middle of the danger.

But in the end we got her back and she was okay, so it all worked out.

Well, almost six months after I said I would, I am FINALLY going to tell you about Harry.

Harry has been my best friend basically since day one on Voyager. We actually met on DS9, when I saved him from being swindled by a Ferengi. When we first started out here, he was so green he was almost fluorescent. But being out here will make you grow up fast, so soon enough he was… less green.

I think Harry just collects misfits, because he befriended B'Elanna right away as well. In fact, that is how B'Elanna and I got to know each other. We both liked Harry so we had to hang out with each other in order to hang out with him. For a couple years the three of us spent most of our off duty time together. But then B'Elanna and I started seeing each other…

We all still hang out quite a bit. I feel it is important that I make time for Harry, just me and him, since I'm still the person he is closest to on the ship. He and I run a holoprogram I created, The Adventures of Captain Proton, which is a sociological study of how the 20th century conceptualized the future through mass media. We have fun doing that (and B'Elanna isn't a huge fan of role playing in the holodeck, so she doesn't feel left out).

Well, I'm running short on time… again. I need to stop writing these letters the day of transmission. B'Elanna says hello to everyone and that she enjoys reading your letters. Also, to answer your question, neither of us changed our name, B'Elanna Paris or Tom Torres just didn't sound right. On top of it, there would then be two Lt. Paris or Torres on the ship.

Until next month,

Tom and B'Elanna

**November 18, 2377**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

Things are going really well on Voyager right now. It has been a calm month, no disasters to speak of. B'Elanna has had more free time than usual, which has been nice. I finally convinced her to come participate in a Captain Proton simulation with Harry and me. She played along for a while, but role playing really isn't her thing. In return for her participation in my program, we were supposed to go rock climbing together the other day, but B'Elanna was feeling a bit tired so we lazed around on the beach instead. It's funny, we are actually getting enough sleep and NOW B'Elanna is feeling wore out. I think she must thrive on our normal level of constant stress or something.

Since B'Elanna made me the television last year, I have gotten really interested in 20th and 21st century entertainment (yes, somehow more so than I was before…). So I created a holographic movie theater for the crew. It is a recreation of the Old Palace Theatre in Chicago. I've been doing 'Movie Night Wednesday' for the past four or five months. It's really been a success and it has gotten other members of the crew interested in old cinema. I started out with old monster movies, but then it was suggested that maybe something a bit more highbrow would be appreciated. So now I am showing movies that won the 'best picture Academy Award,' which basically means it was voted best movie of the year. We started with the first non-silent movie winner and have made it to the 1943 winner, Casablanca. That one was a big hit, B'Elanna really liked it.

I just realized I've spent most of this letter telling you about pointless day to day things we do here on Voyager. But maybe this gives you a better idea of what it is like? It isn't always Borg and danger, most of the time it is us doing our normal duties or sharing meals in the mess hall. Every year there is a talent show that Neelix hosts. B'Elanna and I attend, but neither of us wants to get up in front of everyone. In fact, every year B'Elanna makes the joke that her talent is keeping the ship in one piece, which doesn't translate well to the stage. There is also an annual sports tournament. B'Elanna won the hoverball tournament the second and third years we were out here. Last year we had a ping pong tournament. Harry is pushing for volleyball this year, but I am hoping we will go back to hoverball. It's been a while since B'Elanna and I have played, so it would be a good excuse to get some exercise.

Until next month,

Tom and B'Elanna

**December 20, 2377**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

B'Elanna and I have more crazy and exciting news! B'Elanna is ten weeks pregnant with our baby girl! B'Elanna was a bit hesitant to tell everyone so early in the pregnancy, but everyone on Voyager already knows (because keeping a secret on this ship is impossible) so I wanted to tell you as well.

B'Elanna and I found out two weeks ago. I think in my last letter I had mentioned that she had been feeling a bit out of sorts. Well, it came to a head when she got really dizzy in engineering. One quick scan revealed the reason (although at first Icheb, the teenager we have on board, thought it was a parasite… I guess he was kind of correct). Both B'Elanna and the baby are doing well now, although the Doctor had to give B'Elanna some medication to regulate her hormones. Everyone is very healthy, although we were a bit shocked, since the odds against human/Klingon conception are high. But we are very happy, if having all the worries of first time parents who live in a single, small, room. We've gotten through worse, so I'm sure we will get through this too.

You asked about movie night. Last week we watched the 1946 winner, The Best Years of Our Lives. My favorite so far had been Casablanca.

And to answer your questions about Christmas. Neelix (our cook and morale officer… I don't know if I have mentioned him…) likes to throw a party for every holiday that any member of the crew celebrates. So yes, there is a Christmas party every year, however it is not one of the more popular holiday parties. We have a big crew wide party for the New Year and for Prixin, which is a Talaxian holiday celebrating family. I usually go to the Christmas party if I don't have somewhere else to be. I have never exchanged Christmas gifts with anyone on Voyager (B'Elanna included). Heck, at this point we barely do birthday gifts, since we are normally trying to save our replicator rations for something (although we always do treat ourselves to dinner on our birthdays…). Speaking of which, we need to talk to the captain about getting more replicator rations to get B'Elanna maternity clothes and items for the baby. I just realized you have no idea about replicator rations… We have limited resources on Voyager so we've rationed how much the crew can use the replicators. We're given an allocation, which we can use on food, clothes, etc. Neelix cooks real food in the mess hall, so we always have enough to eat… we just have to eat what he cooks.

I'll let B'Elanna tell you about her experience with Christmas and her favorite movie:

To answer your question, my father's family does celebrate Christmas. My grandmother was a devout Catholic, so these are the traditions that my father followed. When it was just me and my mom, we no longer celebrated human cultural holidays, only Klingon ones. It was not until I went to the academy that I celebrated Christmas again. The first year I was there my grandma contacted me and asked me to come to Christmas at her house in Los Angeles. It was interesting. Like Tom, I have attended Neelix's Christmas party, but it is not one of his better parties, so I do not go out of my way to do so. My favorite movie so far is also Casablanca. I hope this answered all your questions.

Ok Mom, we have to submit this letter now, so until next month.

Tom and B'Elanna

**January 21, 2378**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

B'Elanna is due in sometime around May or June, sorry I forgot to mention that. A typical Klingon pregnancy is thirty weeks, but the doctor isn't sure when B'Elanna will be due since both she and the baby are part human and part Klingon. She is fifteen weeks along and looks and feels quite pregnant. She's not had to replicate the maternity uniform yet, but she did have to replicate a larger uniform. After standing all day at work her back hurts, I think we need to get her a chair or something, but she's resisting me. Also, the Doctor has cautioned her against lying flat on her back for a long period of time (and it is physically impossible for her to lay on her stomach) so her crawling around the ship had been reduced. She isn't happy at how being pregnant is physically preventing her from doing her job, but I told her as Chief Engineer her job is to delegate. She may have punched me in the arm at that juncture. Other than having a harder time crawling around the ship, she is doing very well. Now that I can see that she is pregnant I'm getting very excited. We have also rearranged our quarters and started replicating items for the baby.

We had a bit of excitement in the last week. We ran into some Klingons (yes, Klingons) who have been on a pilgrimage for the last century or so. They were religious fanatics and thought that our baby was the savior of their people. I'm not kidding or exaggerating. So they destroyed their ship in order to follow the kuvah'magh (that is what they called our daughter) so we had to beam them all onto Voyager. We spent a decent amount of time trying to convince them that our daughter was their savior (because their leader was convinced that there would be problems if they thought she wasn't). Then we learned that they were all infected with this virus that would cause them to die prematurely and that this virus was only contagious to Klingons. B'Elanna and the baby were both infected (they're fine now, don't worry) so some of the Klingons decided that the baby could not be the savior and tried to take over the ship. We were able to stop them and the Doctor was able to cure their illness by synthesizing an antivirus from the baby's hybrid cells. So it turned out that she was their savior after all.

Other than that, nothing too interesting has happened. We have continued with movie night (even while the Klingons were here) and this week watched The Greatest Show on Earth (1952) which is about a circus. I don't think the Klingons were too entertained by it.

A couple weekends ago B'Elanna and I 'took a vacation.' We managed to line up enough holodeck time to spend a weekend at a resort on Gedi Prime. We spent most of the time swimming, as it is one of the few physical activities that B'Elanna says the pregnancy hasn't affected. It was nice to spend some time alone, relaxing. It might be the last chance we have for a long time...

I think that is about it for now.

Tom

**February 22, 2378**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

Well… let me start this off by saying everyone is fine. B'Elanna and the baby are both here and healthy and we're all doing well.

We have had a very interesting month. First we were pulled into a subspace void. It was a pretty rough situation at first. For some reason the ship consumed power at a rate ten times higher than normal and there was no deuterium in the void. So even with shutting down life support on all but a few decks, deactivating the turbolifts, etc., we only had enough energy reserves for a week. So here's B'Elanna, sixteen weeks pregnant (but the equivalent size of a human who is about six months pregnant) trying to move between eleven decks using the only the Jefferies tubes. At least our deck's power wasn't shut down, but we did have to open up our quarters to boarders. I could not imagine trying to get B'Elanna to sleep on a cot, she is having enough trouble in our bed. Well, in the end, we figured a way out of it and we were all okay. But I really hope we don't lose turbolifts again before this baby is born.

Just a couple days after we got out of the void, the ship was flooded with tetryon radiation and we had to abandon ship (again, remember the disclaimer at the top). B'Elanna and I were in different escape pods, since I was on the bridge and she was in engineering when the order came. We were taken to a medical facility on a planet called Quarra. When we got there I desperately tried to get to B'Elanna, asking the staff if they knew where she was. Since she is the only pregnant member of the crew, I thought she would be pretty identifiable, but no one knew where she was. They kept insisting that I lay down, that B'Elanna would be treated and then we would be reunited. I kept fighting them, telling them she's my wife and she's pregnant and I needed to know that she was okay. I think they must have given me something, because suddenly I blacked out.

It turned out that on Quarren there is a massive labor shortage. So what they do is abduct people, wipe their memories, and then give them jobs. So that's what happened to us. They erased our memories of each other, so B'Elanna thought that the father of her child had left her.

I ended up working at a restaurant and bar near the power distribution plant that B'Elanna was working at. She came in one morning to eat after her shift and… I can't describe it. It was like love at first sight. I have never felt that way about anyone before… including B'Elanna. I saw her sitting there, reading her book, and I just knew I had to know this woman. I wanted to help her, protect her, be with her. It made no sense at all. I was almost in love with a very pregnant woman I had just met. So I went about winning B'Elanna all over again, only I didn't know I had done it all before. And just like last time, she fell for my charms (although, like last time, it took some persuading).

Fortunately for us, the Doctor, Neelix, Harry, and Chakotay were able to rescue us. The only thing is the first person they rescued was B'Elanna, only from my point of view they kidnapped her. I was so worried about her, which again, was pretty confusing considering I had known her for a week. Then I learned the truth that we were all part of a crew and had our memories wiped. I was happy that B'Elanna was safe, but then I realized that she probably was married, that the father of the baby was probably a brainwashed member of the crew. I realized that I had fallen for a married woman and probably someone I worked with.

When we were all beamed back to the ship, the Doctor administered the treatment to restore our memories. He'd already 'cured' B'Elanna, so she knew who I was. When she came into the cargo bay (where we were all were being kept until we started to remember) I was so relieved and nervous to see her. I expected that she was looking for her baby's father, but instead she came over to me. She told me that she was going to show me to my quarters, that familiar surroundings would help my memories return. So I went with her. In the turbolift I saw she was wearing a wedding ring and my heart sank. We approached our quarters and she turned to look at me. "I don't want you to be startled," she said. "But you share these quarters with your wife." My wife?! I could not believe that we're both married. You may not believe me, but I still had no idea that she was my wife. I nodded, not even thinking to ask who my wife was. We walked in and suddenly a wave of memory hit me. I could remember us in this room, watching TV, lying in bed, eating dinner. I turned to see her smiling at me. "You…" I said. "Yes," she replied, handing me my wedding ring (well, a newly replicated wedding ring, we don't know what happened to the originals). I have never in my life been so relieved and overjoyed.

My memories completely returned after about a day. I don't know why I was so drawn to B'Elanna. She thinks that they didn't do a great job erasing my memories, that somehow I still knew her, was still in love with her. B'Elanna isn't a romantic, the idea that we were fated to be together is too outlandish for her. But I kind of like to think that, that no matter what happens, we would find each other again. It pains me now to think that we may have never made it back to Voyager, but the one solace I have is that I know B'Elanna and I would have been together, we would have raised our baby girl together, even if I never knew I was actually her biological father.

Anyway, that was my last month. I guess I just needed to get all of that out. So, to answer your questions, yes, she is twenty weeks now, and her stomach is still getting bigger. I could tell the difference that three weeks made when I hugged her after we were back on the ship. As to the Klingons, we set them up on an uninhabited M class planet. Hopefully they will do well there. And yes, if Operation Watson works, I may get to speak with you soon. I think we are going to be testing it in a couple weeks so we'll know soon.

Until next time,

Tom and B'Elanna

**March 17, 2378**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

I wanted to send you a quick note now that Operation Watson is working. Evidently we are now going to be allowed to send letters every Friday, although I don't know that enough happens every week to me to warrant a full letter.

I got my date for when I will be able to talk to you: Stardate 54872… a bit under two months from now. I got placed near the end of the rotation, sorry. We're going to talk to B'Elanna's dad tomorrow (she pulled an early number).

Everyone is doing well here. We're at twenty-three weeks now, so only a couple more months to go. I'm excited and nervous all at once, but I suppose this is how all new parents feel.

As usual I waited until the last minute to write, so I have to submit now.

Tom

**April 7, 2378**

To: Paris, Julia

From: Paris, Thomas

Dear Mom,

Let's start with the good news. B'Elanna is doing really well, but is ready for the baby to be born... and we still have five or ten weeks left. She's actually starting to consider working a reduced schedule, which is a big change from her previous stance on the subject. Oh, and she finally replicated that chair.

I know Dad saw it, but I wanted to explain a little about the holonovel the Doctor created. I don't know what you heard, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm aware of it and, well, obviously Voyager isn't like that. From what we have been told it has been recalled, but, just know I haven't grown a terrible mustache…

We also had our first official mission from Starfleet last week. We went to investigate what happened to Friendship One. We found it on a planet that was in the middle of a nuclear winter. I was on the away team that went down there. This was probably the hardest mission I have been on in a long time. We lost a good friend, Joe Carey, B'Elanna's number two in engineering. I also had to deliver a baby down there, one who was born prematurely due to the radiation. We were able to save it, but with our baby so close to being born… that was hard. But we were able to help those people restore their world, so there was a silver lining to it all. But I know that B'Elanna misses Joe a lot. But we will deal with this, just like we have dealt with everything else that has happened in the last seven years.

Tom

**April 26, 2378**

I'm pushing my food around my tray absentmindedly when I hear B'Elanna, who is sitting across from me, say, "Torres to Paris…"

I snap my head up to look at her. She is leaning back in her chair, the food gone from her plate, her hand resting on her stomach, the home of our twenty-nine week old baby. "Yes?"

"I asked you if you were going to eat that. Your daughter's still hungry."

I looked down at the food noting that, although I have barely touched it, I'm not hungry. "No, you can have it," I say as I push the tray over to her.

She begins to eat my food and I sit back a look at her. At least she will be with me this afternoon. Today is my day. My three minutes with my family.

And for some reason I am dreading it.

B'Elanna breaks my musing when she says, "You look like you are a million light-years away. What's going on?"

What do I tell her? That I don't want to talk to my family? Even though they have been sending me supportive letters for almost a year? And my dad gave up a plum assignment to head up the team that was looking for a way to talk to us? After she was able to talk to her dad after all the shit he put her through? How do I tell her that I'm afraid?

"Nothing, just not hungry," I respond, hoping to throw her off.

She makes a non-committal noise that indicates she doesn't believe a word of it and takes another bite of food.

We've been together too long. She knows when I'm being evasive. And she probably also knows what the problem is.

"So, when do we talk to your family? 13:10?"

My suspicion that she knows is confirmed. This is her way of trying to get me to talk.

"Yup," I parry her attempt.

We sit in silence again. It's almost 13:00. We'll have to go down there soon to talk to them. But I don't want to. I'm okay writing them letters. There I can evade and tell half-truths. I can craft the son they wanted, rather than me. When they see me… what will they think? What will they see? How much is left of the failure that left the Alpha Quadrant seven years ago?

It's only three minutes. How much can I disappoint them in three minutes?

B'Elanna sighs and tosses the fork on to the tray. "Tom, just talk to me about it. Why don't you want to talk to them?"

New tactic, she going for the frontal assault. I long for my plate of food to have something to fidget with. "I don't know." Will she let me deflect?

"Bullshit."

I pause for a long moment, looking down at my hands. Finally I look up at her and see the concern. The love. I take a deep breath and try to put my feelings into words that don't sound ridiculous. "What if they don't like what they see?"

B'Elanna furrows her eyebrows, the way she does when she's perplexed. "Is this about the weight?"

I pause. Is she joking?

Another uncomfortable moment passes between us. She continues, "Because this has to be about your physical appearance, given that they have been writing to you for a year now. And told you how proud they are of you. And how happy they are for us. So this must be about the sympathy weight."

I chuckle and shake my head. This woman, she knows exactly how to kick my ass when I am in a self-pity rut.

"It must be," I say.

She smiles and takes my hand. "Don't worry about it. They will love what they see as much as I do."

I know she isn't talking about the extra five kilos.

"Ready to go?" she asks.

It's time.

Soon we are standing in Astrometrics, the same as seven weeks ago when we waited for B'Elanna's dad. Only this time she holds my hand, rather than me holding hers.

Seven makes the connection and there they are. The four of them. The clock starts.

We stare at each other in silence for a moment. Although they sent a photo, they all look so much older. It has been ten years after all. I wonder what they are thinking about me. I'm not in my early twenties anymore.

"Look at you…" my mother whispers. I wonder which one of us she is talking about.

I put on my 'people person Paris' persona, and say, "Hi everyone, I'd like to introduce B'Elanna… my wife." I say those last words with a genuine smile.

"Hi," B'Elanna says with a slightly uncomfortable smile and wave.

"B'Elanna, these are my sisters Moira and Kathleen," they return the silly wave as I say their names, "and my mom Julia and my dad Owen."

"Hi, B'Elanna," my mom says as my dad just nods.

"So, now that everyone's been introduced…" I say, not really knowing where to take the discussion from here.

"B'Elanna, can you step away from the console?" my mom asks. "I want to get a look at this granddaughter of mine."

B'Elanna looks at me, but does as she is asked, stepping away from the console.

"Turn sideways, dear," my mother says. I can see B'Elanna bristle at the word 'dear,' but she turns anyway.

"You're so big for seven months!" my mother exclaims and I can see B'Elanna react yet again.

I decide to step in, draw the attention away from B'Elanna. "Well, mix species and all." I say as I reach my hand out to bring B'Elanna back next to me. "The Doctor still doesn't have a better estimate of when the baby will arrive, but he says that she would survive outside the womb now. So he thinks it will be sometime in the next month or so."

"Are you very uncomfortable?" Moira asks.

"No, not really." B'Elanna lies. I know she doesn't like to admit how the pregnancy is affecting her.

"Well, you look great, you both do… I just can't believe we can actually see and talk to each other," my mother rambles.

Just over a minute has passed. There is a pause as I ponder what to say. Three minutes… it's an awkward amount of time. It's not long enough to say what actually needs to be said. It's too long for just pleasantries.

Thankfully my dad says something. "I've been reading the logs that Kathryn has been sending. You two have done some amazing things out there. I was particularly interested in the slipstream drive you both were working on a couple of years ago."

B'Elanna and I both look down, remembering what Harry told us about that. We were sure the captain did not put that in her official log. "Um, yes, that was pretty interesting," I say.

My dad continues, "We have a team here working with the specs you sent back. Maybe they will be able to make some progress."

"Then you could get home," my mom beams. I shift uncomfortably and B'Elanna tightens her grip on my hand. As usual, my mom is a bit too caught in her own world to notice how uncomfortable she is making me. "What do you two think you would want to do once you get home?"

B'Elanna and I both freeze. How is this so much more uncomfortable that talking with the man that abandoned B'Elanna when she was a child?

My dad rescues us. "I think that is a long time off, Julia. They have other things to worry about before then."

"Like naming that baby!" Kathleen laughs. "Do you have a name for her?"

We do. It's Miral. Miral Torres Paris. But we aren't telling people. B'Elanna told her dad before we had settled on Miral, and before we decided to keep it to ourselves until she is born. "Not yet," I lie. "But we have narrowed it down."

"To what?"

This time Seven saves us. "Thirty seconds, Lieutenant."

"We just have a few seconds left," I say.

My dad speaks. "I love you, son. I'm glad you are doing so well."

I choke up slightly at hearing him say that and feel B'Elanna squeeze my hand yet again. "I miss you all," I say.

A chorus of 'byes' and 'love yous' and 'nice to meet yous' come from the other end of the connection. And then the screen goes black.

We leave the room, so the next person can start their conversation with their loved ones. Waking in silence, we pause when we reach the point where we will have to part ways to return to duty. But I'm not ready. And I think B'Elanna can sense it.

She smiles at me. "It wasn't that bad, now was it?"

"No," I reply. Then I do something I don't normally do in public. I reach out for her, needing to feel her support. She wraps her arms around me and I can feel Miral between us. I rest my cheek against her head.

I may have just been talking to my family, who were sitting in my parents' house, in the place I am from. But that isn't home anymore. B'Elanna's home. Our baby's home. Voyager's home. Standing in this grey hallway on deck 10, in front to the turbolift, my wife in my arms… this is home.

_Fin_


End file.
